ky-ish
2 oct
chorister
fearfully and wonderfully made

every time i fall down on my face
i see the one who bore all my shame

i know you understand it all
so why don't i get back on my feet again



Understand
Jeremy Camp




benleong; benng; daniel; jiakun; julian; nicholas; weiqi; wilford; yiyong; zachary; zhicong;

baifeng; eening; felicia; gohbin; guenyik; jaslyn; kiawee; liuyi; lianjie; ningyu; sarah; shawnteo; siewying; sokkhoong; terence; tianci; valerie; wanjane; wenhao; yinkuan; zongxian;

hci*st.j; boonyang; christopher; dingjie; glen; jianler; kwangyu; sijie; weisheng; yufan;

clarence; claudia; dudley; elgin; francine; francis; jeremy; jerrold; jesslyn; jodi; jonathan; kimfong; leslie; lewis; peggie; raymond; shawn; theodore;

andre; kevin; samuel;


x x

are we making ourselves miserable and tragic?

Supernatural
Daughtry

Lost from the start, I might as well be on the moon
Much colder than I thought even in the month of June
No communication makes you feel so alone
Well, all we need is patience of which I've never really known

But now it's too late, it's taking over me, it feels so supernatural
And I'm pulled the other way, it's more than I can take
And I'm losing hold of everything
And no matter how I try, you know I can't deny
'Cause you feel so supernatural

Every step I've taken Has led me here to where you are
But all that I believe in is keeping me from seeing too far
Throwing out the questions, waiting for the right reply
Looking for the answers, tell me will it be tonight?

But now it's too late, it's taking over me, it feels so supernatural
And I'm pulled the other way, it's more than I can take
And I'm losing hold of everything
Well, it's more than physical, it's kind of hard to see beyond the glow
And no matter how I try, you know I can't deny
'Cause you feel so supernatural

Through the atmosphere I'm seeing
Glimpses of the past I'm leaving
Holding on for life as we collide

But now it's too late, it's taking over me, it feels so supernatural
And I'm pulled the other way, it's more than I can take
And I'm losing hold of everything
Well, it's more than physical, it's kind of hard to see beyond the glow
And no matter how I try, you know I can't deny
'Cause you feel so supernatural

Feel so supernatural, feel so supernatural
Feel so supernatural, feel so supernatural

I stare at a blank, blue wall.
It stares back.
It's the wall that's knowledgeable, if it remembers everything I've said to it.
It knows the entire reproductive system at Secondary 4 level.
It knows what Felsic and Mafic rocks are, and the description of a volcanic eruption as Paroxysmal on the Volcano Explosivity Index.
It also knows (almost) the entire argument on how 'perfect' Perfect Competition is.

Most recently, it has learnt a 5 minute exhortation of glorified aptlessness with regards to the Conservation of Traditional Asian Games.

Slow Dancing In A Burning Room
John Mayer

It's not a silly little moment,
It's not the storm before the calm.
This is the deep and dying breath of
This love that we've been working on.

Can't seem to hold you like I want to
So I can feel you in my arms.
Nobody's gonna come and save you,
We pulled too many false alarms.

We're going down,
And you can see it too.
We're going down,
And you know that we're doomed.
My dear,
We're slow dancing in a burning room.

I was the one you always dreamed of,
You were the one I tried to draw.
How dare you say it's nothing to me?
Baby, you're the only light I ever saw.

I'll make the most of all the sadness,
You'll be a bitch because you can.
You try to hit me just to hurt me
So you leave me feeling dirty
Because you can't understand.

We're going down,
And you can see it too.
We're going down,
And you know that we're doomed.
My dear,
We're slow dancing in a burning room.

Go cry about it - why don't you?
Go cry about it - why don't you?
Go cry about it - why don't you?

My dear, we're slow dancing in a burning room,
Burning room.

Don't you think we oughta know by now?
Don't you think we shoulda learned somehow?

Mother: What are you doing up at this time?
Son: Erm... I don't know.

He flared up, walked out.
They stared.
She ran after him.

She caught hold of his arms and hugged tight
"No, please don't go!"
Adamant, or a self-justified action - he grasped her slender arms
They were twigs
Shoved aside, walked on
Drove away, lamps on
With pain in his heart but it had to be done
and it was for the better.

Breaths convulsed, face crimson
As light reflected off the streaks on her cheeks
Like an open book now with no restraint, she let loose
"Look at what you all have done!
Now he's gone. Gone."

--

They met on the way to school, she walking from McDonald's, he cycling from home. And it's in these cases he sometimes had no choice but to think up a pick-up line or two, to make conversation, whether forced or voluntary. Perhaps its etiquette. Or being sociable. Or just trying not to be an idiot.

The boy refused to let the girl ride with him on the bicycle even though the girl was quite pretty (of course he didn't express this explicitly to the girl, for the same reasons above), so they walked. Which meant an extended conversation because to get to school on foot would mean a 15 minute walk. And conversation was so easily exhausted, to a point where only serenity and solitude permeated the atmosphere for 5 whole minutes.

Then somehow they talked about couples. And she uttered,
"I think that guy was a jerk. I've found a better guy now, he's tons better than him."

Like an open book he read her, and he knew something about her told otherwise.

i think i'm becoming the opinionated, judgemental self that i dislike

it's funny how we can be only two clicks away from reconciliation, yet I always lack the courage to make that first click

or say that first word, of a conversation that is not a mere passing remark or a "Hi" and "Goodbye".

i'm tired of subtleties and indirect conversation.
i'm tired of my cowardice.